Pugs & Kelly Live: Blog

*"El Distorto De Melodica" @ 11:06*

Kelly warns that you dodgeball people can only have two teams because we have jobs and it's going to 2 AM. Pugs also lets us know that there will be added security at dodgeball because we can't have the refs being attacked anymore. Eric says that his girlfriend is still hurt but she's not mad at Eric anymore. Pugs doesn't care if she's mad at him because he doesn't have to sleep with her. Eric tells Pugs that she received Pugs' sweet E-mail. Pugs thinks it's fine that she's holding a grudge but finds that a very unattractive quality. Eric assures Pugs that she's not holding a grudge. Sybil likes Pugs and Kelly's fancy blue T-shirts. Kelly explains that there is a team that plays dodgeball called Gerry's Kids and they made these uniforms and gave everybody on the show a shirt. Sybil was wearing hers yesterday and Pugs asked her if she was going to wear the shirt everyday. Sybil told him that she only wore it twice and Pugs asked her if it's her default shirt in the morning. Pugs says that between her and Eric, they're constantly wearing that shirt. Pugs was going to wear it on Monday but knew that Eric or Sybil was going to wear the shirt so, he didn't. He walked in and sure enough she was wearing the shirt. Kelly thought to irritate Pugs, she'd wear her Gerry's Kids shirt today. Pugs thought that since he made a big stink about Sybil's shirt yesterday, nobody would wear the shirt for a couple of days and now Kelly and he are dressed like a like. Tyson dropped Kelly off and stopped by the office to talk to Pugs. In the middle of the conversation he stopped and said "that's funny". Pugs asked him what was so funny and Tyson told him that he'd see. Pugs isn't going to tie his up like Kelly did. Kelly tells him that he should because it looks hot. Aaron from Gerry's Kids calls in to ask who is wearing his shirt. They tell him that Sybil wore it yesterday and Pugs and Kelly are wearing it today. Pugs would like to get his name BeDazzled on the back of the shirts. Kelly informs us that Will wore his Gerry's Kids shirt yesterday. Pugs wonders if Kelly is taking her "Emil pills" and she is. Eric thinks that it's making a huge difference on himself. Pugs feels more focused. Eric thinks that he put something into him that was definitely missing. Kelly points out that it gives you florescent urine. Pugs has that too and points out that it matches the Live 105.3 yellow. Pugs compares it to having nuclear urine because it glows. He wonders what other things you can take to make your pee a funny color. Kelly wonders if they have such a short attention span that in order to make their life more entertaining, they have to try to excrete different colors. Pugs reminds her that they work 4 hours a day and they have a lot of time to kill. Bradley calls in to ask if there is Vitamin B in those pills because that makes your pee turn neon yellow. Joe calls in to suggest drinking a gallon of purple Gatorade because it turns it green. Joe tells him that it takes 6 hours though. Pugs is disappointed because he wanted to make Cody do that on today's show.

11:22
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11:33

Pugs says that there are some people that may think that he was a little hard on Eric's girlfriend yesterday. To those people, Pugs says "phhht". Pugs thinks it was inappropriate if they were in the business of selling Widgets to South America but they do a radio show. Kelly thinks that Pugs was deliberately trying to get to Eric and Pugs tells her that she's right. Kelly says that it had nothing to do with Melissa.. he was just trying to get to Eric to feel uncomfortable. Pugs thinks that everyone is out of shape because it was public. If he was saying that to Eric at the Pub and Grub everyone would chuckle about it. Pugs wonders how people would handle that situation if it was at the office water cooler. Kelly wonders what you can do if your boss calls your girlfriend a whore. Pugs thinks it depends on your relationship with your boss because it's a buddies' job to make sure you don't get involved with a whore. Kelly wants to know if you can tell your boss he's out of line or if you can report him to human resources. Steve calls in and says that he had to work for a bunch of rednecks in a milk company in South Carolina and this happened to him. Pugs doesn't think that these people probably didn't handle it too delicate. His boss said something about his wife and he feels that you can't allow that to happen. A dude calls in to say that in the Mafia they had a set of rules that didn't allow members to sleep with each other's wives in order to not promote in-fighting. Pugs thinks that you have to take a baseball bat to your boss' car in the parking lot with a ski mask too. Lolly thinks you should make a joke out of it in order to let the boss know that he's not getting to you. Pugs thinks that it's never a joke when somebody says something about the person you love. Eric reminds Pugs that he said things about Melissa yesterday in a way that wasn't too elegant. Pugs wonders what he plans on doing about it.. "nothing... that's right bitch I'm you're boss". Gavin walks into the room and wants to know who is Eric's boss. Pugs tells Gavin that if he doesn't Eric to be his producer anymore than he's gone. Gavin seems interested that Pugs seems to have that position on this. Pugs knows that Gavin knows that this is a family environment and that they all have a say in what happens on the show but he teaches us that Kelly fired Bobby and Pugs wanted to keep him. Kelly reminds Pugs that he blew off their meeting to play poker. Kelly asks how Gavin handled bosses hitting on his ex-wife because she heard that she was quite pretty. Gavin says that it did happened a lot and has learned that you just get used to it. Kelly thinks that maybe that's why Gavin is divorced.

11:45
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11:53

*"El Distorto De Melodica" @ 11:19*

Pugs understands what it's like to be a video game dork. He played Grand Theft Auto: Vice City on the X-box from 2:30 PM to 1:00 am. Pugs doesn't know how to target his pistol. Pugs never thought that we had to restrict kids from games but this one needs to be restricted. Dr. Schwartz, Wayne, and Bruce got an X-box for Pugs' birthday. Cody comes into say that this game is one of the best rated games ever. Kelly wonders if this is the game where you can kill hookers and Cody confirms. Pugs doesn't do the missions. He just kills the first cop he sees, takes his money, car, and gun and spends the next ten minutes getting chased around the city by swat guys. He thinks it's awesome. Kelly finds this unsettling. Pugs can't see any reason there is a debate over parents letting their children play this game because there is no way in hell kids should be allowed to play this game. There are prostitutes walking around offering sex. Pugs brings up how you can go on a rampage where the screen will tell you that you have to kill as many gang members as you can. Pugs thinks it's a great outlet for his rage. If he was an impressionable teen he could see how he might think it's ok to slug the first cop he sees walking down the street but, we all know that it's wrong. Pugs claims that he can't wait to get home to play it again. Cody warns Pugs that he'll get addicted because the city is so massive and there is always something to do. Pugs explains to Kelly that the premise of the game is that somebody "stoled" all his coke and now he has to get it back. Kelly wonders who Pugs is now, he's voicing cartoons and playing video games. Pugs excitingly explains that the guy that voices his character on Vice City is Ray Liotta. A guy calls in to say that he can auto-target with the left trigger. Pugs was really apathetic about this video game thing they're broadcasting from on Friday and now he can't wait to go. Kelly brings up how Tyson signed up to some place online to play poker for hours with people from around the world while watching baseball. Kelly thinks that everybody has changed except for her. A guy calls in to say that in Vice City you can bang prostitutes to get healthier.   Pugs has discovered that "old men tourist" carry a lot of cash so, he likes to hang out by the hospital and mug them. Kelly thinks that this may all be a ploy by the government to see who it is they have to watch. Pugs thinks that Kelly has to be careful because Declan is growing up in the video game generation and it's going to influence him more than rap music or the movies he's watching. Pugs says that Paco likes to get weapons, climb onto a roof and snipe Haitians. Kelly wonders if he means in the video game or in real life because it sounds like something he would do. Pugs can't believe the carnage that he's causing while he's laying in bed.   He assures us that he's very pro-cop and wouldn't go out killing cops.. except in Vice City where killing cops is fun. Cody thinks that if you imitate that kind of violence in real life then there is something wrong with you. You're not going to find a rocket launcher laying in the trash can outside and Pugs points out that while that will never happen in real life, if it was to happen, you'd be ready. Tony calls in to thank Pugs for shaking up the dork tree. Pugs points out that the phone lines are lit up with dorks and Kelly just got ten e-mail on the subject. Tony teaches us that you can't get this game unless your 18 and Kelly doesn't think that the Best Buy isn't trained to card people. Tony tells Pugs that the new Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas is coming out this fall and Pugs already knows. Pugs' character looks like he's on PCP because he's freaking out, shooting people for no reason, and he's just totally out of his mind. Pugs doesn't want anymore gaming talk because he's not ready. He's only been a "gamer" for 48 hours.

11:38
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11:52

Kelly wonders how Pugs' patrol of the chatroom is going and Pugs assures her that he's keeping an eye on it. Kelly thinks that he gave up on it and got bored. Pugs lets her know that he was in there all night but he wasn't in there as Pugs, "Hello, my name is Brent,". He has a list in a notebook byu his computer and he's going to reveal his list of the trouble makers in a week. Kelly got an e-mail from Tim that criticizes the show for talking about a game that's "like 50 years old". Pugs lets Tim know that he's such a nerd and Kelly thinks that Tim can't possibly be seriously mocking them for talking about a video game. Kelly also got an e-mail that questions her commenting on how everyone has changed except for her. The E-mailer points out that Kelly had a major cosmetic change. Stacy E-mails to say that her husband played that Vice City game three times through and now he goes around shooting people, not for real of course. Kelly remembers her friend Wendy gave her husband a video game with stipulations. Pugs points out that he can't really enjoy the gift then and Kelly feels the same way. She compares it to somebody giving her a little bit of cocaine and being told that this was all she was going to get. Pugs reminds us that Kelly wants a duffel bag. Pugs says that his mother put cable into his room so that he wouldn't bother him and now today he rarely comes out of his room.    Pugs thinks that if a woman buys her husband an X-box and then complains about how he doesn't spend any time with her then it's her fault because she had no foresight.   Pugs tried to quit at 6:30 PM yesterday but couldn't stop. Kelly lets Pugs know that I just IMed her to say, "playing video games? watching chat rooms? what a friggin' dork... did he have his Spock ears on while he doing this"... A dude calls in to say that he lost a girlfriend over a game that was very addictive. She tried it for five minutes and got instantly hooked to Everquest AKA Evercrack. Kelly points out that they recently discovered that Sybil is a Sims or a Sim City dork. Sybil says that she never played but she wants to really badly. Pugs wonders what the premise of Sim City is and Kelly teaches him that you have to build a city. Pugs thinks that sounds boring and wonders if you get to kill any prostitutes. Kelly warns that you're city is always running so that if you leave and come back then there might have been a massive fire and you have to rebuild. Pugs thinks that somebody should call him if there's a massive fire in his city. Jason calls in to say that in The Sims you actually live your life as a character on the screen and on Sim City you plan how to build your city. Pugs wonders if you have to go to Home Depot for that and he explains that it's pretty fun. you have to plan the plumbing, where to zone the entertainment sector ETC. Pugs thinks that this sounds like you would require a degree in urban planning to play. Jason switches back to the Sim and tells us that you can attend parties as your Sim and pick up chicks. Pugs thinks that there are probably dorks out there that view getting their sim laid as a conquest. Kim calls in to say that she was a Sims junkie until she didn't get her sim a cooking class and she caught fire while cooking and died.   the grim reaper came and an urn now lays where her body was. Everytimg a character walks by it, they start crying. Kelly thinks that's a constant reminder of your failure as a character manipulator. Kim explains that there is a gauge to see how much somebody likes you and if you can make out with people and fall in love with some characters. Kelly thinks that his sounds way better than the life that she's living know. Pugs thinks it's funny that he could catch fire and die because he doesn't have a cook book. ... one of the things I would do in The Sims is build a small room, trick my sim into going into there, get rid of the door and replace it with a wall, then put up pictures of clowns, I would keep them in there and the would go insane, poop their pants, and eventually die.... Kelly finds out that you can bitch slap people for hitting on your love interest in the Sims.

After the show on Friday, everyone was sitting around talking to Eric. Pugs and Kelly like Eric's girlfriend, Melissa. Melissa was romantically linked to another associate of the show, James. Pugs wonders if it was a true romantic link or did James just bang the snot out of her. Eric sounds a bit disturbed but then tells Pugs that they were just dating. Pugs doesn't think they were dating because, "where the hell would James take her?". Pugs reminds us that James and Eric use to be equals on this show and Eric agrees that is the case except for when James completely F***ed up. Pugs teaches us that James didn't F**** up, he was just a victim of corporate politics. Pugs wonders if Eric met her through James. Eric says sort of. She is a fan of the show and sent Eric an E-mail before he knew that she was dating James.   She sent him a photoshop picture of himself and they talked for a little bit.

I did a little digging and found this picture.... she's quite the talented woman.

He found out that she was hanging out with James but there was nothing going on between them. Pugs points out that was a bit of a lie because they were humping. Eric thinks that it was a mistake in her life that she wishes she could erase from her life. Pugs wonders if Eric means "her crazy wild sweaty monkey sex with James in his funky apartment" and Eric clarifies that she means "her less than adequate, mediocre sex with James in his sweaty apartment".   Eric claims that's what he hears and that's what he chooses to believe. Kelly wonders if they can still be friends after a comment like that and Pugs lets her know that guys can take shots at each other. Pugs wonders how this has affected James and Eric's relationship because he remembers them being "as thick as thieves". Eric explains that they weren't that close. They worked together and competed with each other. They never really hung out outside of station events.   Kelly recalls them being in a rap group together. Eric explains that he protested that several times but James is very persistent when he wants you to be a part of something. He was with it for a while but he never wanted to do it in the first place. Eric and James are friendly but he finds it strange. Pugs brings up that it's because his girlfriend banged him and Eric sounds... really uncomfortable. Pugs wonders if in the middle of the night, she craves James.   Kelly thinks that sounds really strange. Pugs says.. "James, it's what you crave". Kelly wants to go Pugs' house and search for Harlequin romance books. Eric explains that the deal with him and James now is that on Thursday, they were discussing Melissa's relationship with her ex-boyfriend. James made a comment to her in passing insinuating that Eric is trying to tell her what to do in her life. Melissa was going to hang out with James so that he can help her with some web site stuff. Pugs thinks that there should be no reason what so ever for her to ever speak to James without Eric around. Kelly thinks that since she has moved on and therefore there are no feelings involved with anybody she may have been previously with. Eric explains that he doesn't like the ex-boyfriend before James because he still harbors feelings for him. Kelly reminds us she was in a long term relationship with him and Pugs says that the thing with James was just mindless sex. Eric thinks that James may be a little sore that he ended up with the girl so he looks for opportunities to take shots. Eric has also noticed James approach her at Duke's and pull the "extra touchy feely James" move where he has the limber arms towards her. Pugs thinks that James has the confidence that guys have when they've already tapped it.

12:23
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12:36

Kelly is observing the chatroom and nobody is doing anything. Pugs apologizes to Melissa... "So what... so you slept with James... a lot of people have slept with James... so what?"... Kelly points out that he's trying to upset Eric because he thinks it's funny. Pugs says that Melissa is the sweetest thing and he knows that she's sensitive so he's sorry. Kelly points out that with all the people in this room, they sure do have a lot of nerve to be talking in this way. Pugs brings up that if you know that she was having sex with James that it's not the tender sex.. it's the "slimy James" sex. Pugs teaches us that it's not like she's a crack whore so what... huh?.... Pugs wonders what the girl's point of view on sex with an ex is. Kelly thinks that if you're drunk and talking with an ex, you'll tend to remember the good times that you had. She also thinks that you're more likely to go home with somebody that you've slept with over somebody new. Pugs reminds us that it doesn't count against your "number" either.    Kelly thinks that you can't be called a whore if you've only slept with 4 people. Kelly calls in to say that recycling is the way to go because your number stays the same, you know what to expect and she thinks that the guys know the game so there are no false impressions. She says that she's getting married now so those days are behind her. Kelly thinks that Kelly is right, she won't ever have sex again. Pugs points out that Kelly is at a good age to get married, 272, she'll be divorced by 30 and by 31 she'll be ready for the bars again. A girl calls in to say that she's 23 and have been with 11 people. She lost her virginity when she was 18 to a guy she was with for 2 years. Pugs thinks that she must have been on quite the tear after 20. She claims that when she lost it she realized that it was just an act and thought "what the hell.. if guys can do it...". Kelly thinks that a lot of girls feel that way and then their view dramatically changes. She says that the guy she originally was with is no back with her and they're engaged to be married. Pugs wonders if he knows about he 11 guy tear that she went on and she says he does. Kelly thinks that most relationships should follow the "don't ask, don't tell" policy. Pugs thinks that if you wait long enough then it's' like a whole new person so a guy can add the ex as another number on his list but, girls don't. Kelly reminds us that everybody lies and it doesn't help to know those numbers. She thinks that just cause somebody says that they only slept with 2 people, it doesn't make them clean because, the might have both been street hookers. Pugs thinks that no self-respecting man counts the prostitutes to their number. Julie calls in to say that she was 40 men before she got married. Julie is almost 30... lost it at 15... married for 5... according to Will's math, if she had a steady pace for the 10 years she was sexually active then she would have a new partner every 13 weeks.... THE James calls into the show. He claims to be "Switzerland to the max" on the situation between Eric and Melissa. James is aware of how awkward this is and he's taken steps to isolate himself from any type of drama taking place. Pugs wonders why it has to be awkward because James lives in one part of town and Eric and Melissa live on the other side of town. Pugs brings up how Eric already said that he hated James. Eric denies saying he hated James. Pugs asks if James has had any contact with Melissa. James says that he bumped into her at dodgeball and various station events. Eric lets James know that he's a little too cordial at dodgeball and describes James as having limber arms and undressing eyes. James tells us that he does the one-armed-half-assed-friend hug and Kelly confirms that he does do that.   Pugs doesn't think that's important and asks James if he told Eric's girlfriend, after the conversation on the air last week, that Eric shouldn't be allowed to tell her who she can be friends with. James admits it. Eric chimes in with "Dude, what's up bro?.... that's meddling" James doesn't think it's meddling at all and Pugs and Kelly disagree with him. Kelly thinks that James may have planted in her head the idea that her relationship is starting to control her. James lets us know that the conversation was initiated by her and her biggest concern was that she was worried that she may be losing some of her individuality in the relationship. He did tell her that she shouldn't let other people decide who her friends are but, of all the opinions she considers in the decision making process, Eric's should be the first one. James says that their not really friends and that his loyalties obviously lie with Eric and Pugs calls BS on that. Pugs wonders if from his male-ego point of view if James is bothered that she chose Eric over him. James doesn't think it really bothers him because Eric is a cool guy and Pugs reminds James that she's a fantastic girl. He wonders who he let that one get away. Kelly calls Pugs on being such an instigator. James does think she's an awesome girl and that's why he's happy for Eric. Pugs calls BS on that one too. James says that he has no problem getting girls so this doesn't bother him. He knows that they're a great match. She looks at Eric in ways she never stared at himself. Pugs wonders if James thinks to himself, "what is it that she sees in him that she doesn't see in me?". Kelly thinks Pugs can stop with the instigation. James doesn't think that he should live under the idea that every girl is his soul mate or even more compatible with himself than Eric. James thinks it's a "bitch attitude" to have the idea "if I can't have her.. nobody will.. least of all, one of my friends". Pugs points out that it appears as if James is doing that. James claims that the advice he gave would go out to anybody that asked him. Kelly wants to know how Eric knew what James told Melissa and Eric reminds her that they're completely honest with each other. Kelly thinks that they're is no such thing as an open and honest relationship. Pugs thinks this is the biggest violation of one of the biggest ideas amongst his friends, you don't follow one of your friends. Eric says that he had big issues with that when the first started dating and he thought it was over-stepping the boundaries of the guy code. He claims that he can't help what happened to him over this girl. Pugs believes that the ideal situation would be if the friend was dead. Kelly thinks that if James cared for Eric at all, he'd move away. James points out that if you look at the timeline of events between Eric's relationship with Melissa and his own dealings with her then you would see that Eric took Melissa right from under his nose. Pugs thinks that this is the perfect motivation for James to sabotage their relationship. James agrees with Pugs IF he was a little shallow pud but, he's not. Kelly informs James that she was accepted to med school.

1:09
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1:24

They debut a new news theme for Sybil produced by James. Pugs and Kelly like it. Pugs thinks that James is very good when he's not trying to break up Eric's relationships. Kelly thinks that to make it better, he needs to get a cut of Sybil giggling and put it in there.

SYBILIZATION AS WE KNOW IT!

1. Raleigh, North Carolina... a dentist is in trouble for injecting semen into his patients mouth. After a few allegations by former employees, authorities took a few syringes and tested them. They were found to contain semen. People complained that they had a funny taste in their mouth.
Kelly reminds us that you always have a funny taste in your mouth after going tot he dentist. Kelly found out that she was tested for a lot of diseases at the gyno without being informed about it. She thinks it's funny it was after she was asked if she was in an exclusive relationship and what he did for a living. Kelly doesn't want to know if she's been tested and the results come back negative. Pugs would like to know because if they test him for HIV and tell him that he's negative then it still feels good. That way you don't have to go through the stress of being tested for HIV and the wait time that goes along with it.

2. Planned Parenthood is offering a T-shirt that read "I had an abortion".
Eric and Pugs say that they would wear that shirt. Kelly thinks there needs to be a better tagline at the end of it because you can make that funny. Sybil is pro-choice but questions why anybody would wear it because it's just asking for people to berate you. Pugs thinks that it's just Planned Parenthood's way of raising the level of awareness of this debate. Pugs is pro-choice but he thinks that if you advertise the fact that you're proud that you had an abortion then there is something wrong with you. He thinks that you should be proud to be from a place where you have the choice to have an abortion. Kelly compares that to somebody wearing a shirt that reads "man.. I was so wasted last night... Kelly obviously hasn't hung out with any of the stupid-ass college co-eds that I have the displeasure of being near from time to time.

3. Ken Jennings is kick ass on Jeopardy still.. his total, as of Friday, is.. damn it... too many numbers too fast... over a million dollars.
Kelly thinks that this might be a publicity attempt by Jeopardy and questions the validity of this streak. Kelly reminds us that he could have done just one episode of "Who Wants to be a Millionaire" and won that money.

4. Mary-Kate Olsen was discharged from rehab after being treated for her "eating disorder".
Pugs points out that they all did the finger quotes on "eating disorder". Kelly wonders if it's true that the place she was at didn't' even treat eating disorders because she heard that it doesn't. Somebody sent her an e-mail about that and Pugs thinks that if she got in an E-mail than it must be true. Kelly asks which is hotter, a coke head or a bulimic. Pugs thinks that a coke head is hotter than a girl with puke on her chin. The bulimic's breath is nasty and the coke head is just hard to live with. She tosses and turns all night. Kelly points out though that if you do both correctly, you'll be very thin.

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1:53

5. Natalie Maines of the Dixie Chicks just gave birth to her second child, Beckett Finn Pasdar.

6. John Kerry stiffed a waiter on 262 dollar bill on June 5th.
Pugs and Kelly remind us that politicians, especially politicians on the campaign trial, normally have somebody to handle all of that so you can't blame Kerry for being cheap.

7. Steven Seagle just released an album and it's number one in France.
Pugs wonders what the hell the French know... these are the guys that think Jerry Lewis is funny. They listen to a few samples... it's OK. They listen to one that he performed with Stevie Wonder.. Pugs wonders if they told Stevie who it was he was working with.

8. The Sopranos won't come out till 2006. HBO hopes David Chase will write more episodes then he agreed to do.

9. Paris Hilton got a cat named Dulce.

10. WEEKEND BOX OFFICE UPDATE
5. Cinderella Story
4. Spiderman 2
3. Catwoman
2. I, Robot
1. The Bourne Supremacy

2:15
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2:25

Kelly invites people to the chatroom but warns that you will be kicked out as soon as she learns how to do that. Declan asked Kelly how old you have to be before you can have sex. Kelly thinks that was an interesting way to phrase that question. She practiced the sex talk in her head but an age never came up. Kelly thinks that you can't say, "wait till marriage" because, that's completely unrealistic. If you're given an unrealistic goal then you blow it off. Kelly doesn't want her kid to be a 35 year old virgin. She also doesn't want him to get married at 20 just so he can have sex. Pugs wonders what the rules are for her daughter and Kelly thinks that he daughter isn't allowed to ever have sex. Pugs asks Eric when he lost his virginity and Eric tells him 15. Pugs wonders what his name was. Sybil lost hers at 16. Pugs and Kelly lost it at 17. Pugs was the second to last to lose it amongst his friends and Sybil was the last one.   Sybil says that she doesn't regret it but it was bad. Pugs points out that it's bad the first 50 times you do it. Kelly regrets it and wishes she would have waited. Justin calls in to say that he lost his virginity in Oklahoma at 15 on a motorcycle. Pugs teaches us that rural kids have sex and get into drugs very early because there is nothing else to do. He thinks that is where 15 year olds get hooked on meth all because they're bored.

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BYE BYE!!!

comments? E-mail Will at will@pugsandkellylive.com