The show started earlier than I did. I started listening around 10:45...
Kelly has received an e-mail from Cowboy BJ. Pugs imagines that Cowboy BJ is popular at the truck stops. Kelly says that she likes him a lot but she doesn't know how to take this E-mail. He says that he hasn't seen them in person for a long time but he's been looking at photos and noticed that Kelly finally put on some weight. He says that she looks very cute and quite fetching. Kelly wonders if it's ever a good thing to tell somebody that they put on weight. Pugs thinks it's OK and Kelly strongly disagrees. Kelly can only see Larry and Cody as the only ones in the building that would love to hear "hey, good job on putting on weight.". She wonders if al lthe pictures on the website make her look fat. Pugs thinks it's all the muscle she's been putting on. Pugs thinks that she's starting to look a little tough. Kelly thinks it might just be here negative attitude. Eric reveals that he told his girlfriend that she should starve herself and work out to cause her muscle to atrophy after she complained about muscle gain. Pugs thinks Kelly looks more sturdy and Eric calls her more fit. Kelly says that her sizes have been going down. Pugs wonders if Kelly sees a big fat girl staring back at her in the mirror and Kelly admits that she does. Pugs thinks that everyone thinks they're fatter than they really are except for fat people, who think they're just fine. Veronica calls in to say that these men just didn't use the right words and assures Kelly that she looks great. Pugs thinks it would be good to tell an anorexic chick that she's put on weight and Kelly reminds him that they live in fear of that.
Kelly has no home phone. She's been putting it off since her move. She thought about it and realized that she would just use her cell phone if she needs to make calls Pugs can't think of anybody that uses their home phone. Kelly says that her friend Sherry has a home phone but she never calls her on that. Kelly has thought about having a phone when there is a baby sitter over because she worries about her baby sitters' cell phones dying. She's been thinking about getting her 8 year old son a cell phone. Pugs sighs heavily. Kelly knows that if he's safe around a lot of UFC fighters but wants him to have a phone in case he needs to call her to pick him up. Kelly thinks that it seems wrong to get an 8 year old a cell phone. She doesn't want him to develop an LA attitude. Pugs says that aside from him losing it, he doesn't see the downside of letting an 8 year old have a cell phone. His initial reaction was that he shouldn't get one because a little boy should be a little boy. After a little thought, he realizes that there is no reason why he shouldn't have a phone now. Paula calls in to say that her 11 year has a cell phone. She gives it to him whenever he'd be at a friend's house. Pugs suggests that Kelly get a phone with a two way. Kelly says that she has that feature on her phone now but can't figure out how to do it. Pugs says that he does it with a sales guy and that Kelly is ruining their walkie talkie fun time with her inability to work her machine. Greg Hill, of the New You Show, calls in. Greg thinks that it would be a great idea to get a two way because you can e-mail your friends with a computer. You can also instant message. He says that 8 year olds are all doing that now. He thinks it's good to learn how to spell words and increases vocabulary. Pugs wants to ask Greg something but Greg is gone. Brittany, who sound quite angry, thinks that it's decadent and spoiled to get a kid a cell phone. She complains that everyone and their dog has a cell phone now. She doesn't see why he can't use his friends' phone.... Yeah, that's what you want. Your kid to be the "hey, can I bum this off you?" guy. Nothing worse than a bummer. Everyone hates that guy.... Kelly says that she would rather have her son be self-sufficient. Heather calls in to say that she doesn't think he needs a cell phone but suggests that Kelly get a house phone. Kelly reveals that she just recently figured out that Declan can put up his own clothes. Pugs reveals that he had to do a lot of chores growing up but he'd do it poorly so that she wouldn't ask him to do it again. Kelly complains that her brother Kevin use to do that and she would be forced to wash all the dishes. Pugs tells us that he washed everything in bleach one time but she then taught him how to do it the right way. Kelly says that she threatens her children by telling them that she has secret cameras all over the house. When something bad happens and they don't confess, she tells them that she's going to rewind the tape and see what happened. Pugs tells us that his mom would answer the phone and pretend to be talking to Santa. Pugs and Kelly wonder how you call 911 from your cell phone. Eric tries to call but Kelly reminds him that they'll show up if he does that. A guy calls in to say that "you have the sexiest voice ever" and Pugs thanks him. Kelly thanks him too. Pugs really thinks that somebody with kids should have a home phone line and Kelly reminds him that somebody could cut the line. Pugs informs Kelly that he was just talking about calling the fire department in case of a pop tart catching fire not an all out ninja attack. He tells Kelly that she will never be able to defend against ninjas... That's why Kelly should get ninja repellant... Pugs suggest that Kelly get Declan the rapper cell phone... he then starts singing the commercial.
*break*
Pugs says that he didn't much over the weekend. He's been feeling under the weather. He watched "The Alamo" and didn't like it. Emil told Pugs about this great pizza joint. He reminds us that he hasn't really found a thin crust pizza joint that he has embraced. He went to Fire Side and Pugs gives it his highest thumbs up. Kelly is starving and wonders if anybody is roaming the halls that could get them food. Pugs says he can't keep anything down so he doesn't want to eat. He realizes that isn't the best way to recap a review of a restaurant he likes and assures us that his current digestive problems has nothing to do with Fire Side. Pugs went to a movie with Aaron (from Metro Limo) and Pugs' Lady Friend, Tammy, went to a movie. The outranked him and forced him to see Ocean's 12. Pugs thought it was awful and over complicated for the sake of being complicated. Pugs didn't like the other one either. He liked the original Sinatra version a lot though. Sybil saw it too and she agrees. She thinks that they had characters that had no reason being in the movie. Pugs reminds us that he's a movie snob. PUgs and Sybil agree that they just made up characters in the last ten minutes to explain everything. AFI, the American Film Institute, has put out a list of the best movies in 2004.
The Aviator.
THis movie hasn't come out yet. Pugs hopes this movie isn't like Gangs of New York. That was a movie that he really wanted to see until he actually got the chance to see it. Pugs and Kelly think this movie looks good.
Collateral.
Eric thinks that movie blows. Pugs thinks Eric is the only one that hates that movie. Eric calls it predictable action crap. Kelly complains about her electronics not working at home.
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind.
Pugs likes this movie and calls it a depressingly good movie. Kelly reminds us that it brings up the question "if you could, would you erase all your memories of your ex". Pugs tells the plot of the movie and informs us that the Polyphonic Spree is all over the movie. He warns us that it's a very tough movie to watch. It's a movie for people that have had their heart broken.
Friday NIght Lights
Pugs and Eric loved the movie. Pugs informs us that he's going to own this movie. Kelly wants to see it.
The Incredible.
Kelly loved that movie. She explains the story.
Jessa calls in to add Closer to the list. Pugs thinks that looks like a snooze fest. Jessa thinks that it probably is for him because it's more dialogue than action. Pugs sounds offended and reminds Jessa that he loved Eternal Sunshine of a Spotless Mind. Pugs likes that Natalie Portman and decides to watch it. Kelly tells us that Natalie Portman knows what it's like to be a black woman. Michael calls in to say Team America. Michael says it's a great movie. Eric thinks it's well done and thinks it's just low brow humor. A guy calls in to suggest Lost in Translation. Kelly watched that movie over the weekend a few times and thought about how she doesn't want to live in Japan. Pugs thinks that's the whole point of the movie. These two people who would never know each other, get to know each other over their hatred of Japan. Kelly reminds him that movie came out last year so it's not eligible.
Kinsey
Pugs and Kelly want to see that movie. Pugs wanted to watch that movie with Aaron and his girlfriend. He tells us that if you take a boyfriend to see Kinsey then he'll think that he's going to get it. Kelly thinks it's weird to see a movie about exploring your sexuality with his best friend and his girlfriend. Kelly is sure that Aaron would be the one taking him home.
Maria Full of Grace
Pugs wanted to see that movie but hasn't. He wants them to dub that into English because he doesn't want to read.
Debbie calls in to bring up Ray. She loves it and regrets never seeing him in person when he was alive. Pugs agrees. He never cared about Ray Charles until he saw that movie. Kelly says that her grandmother watched a movie on Cole Porter and complained that it was all about him being gay. She tells us that her grandmother had no problem with him being gay but, wanted to know about other aspects of his life and work. A guy calls in to say that he thinks they made Dallas Carter High School a little racist in Friday Night Lights. Pugs says that they just made them seem dirty. He reminds us that there are just some teams that have that rep. He points out that Odessa seems like they'd be a team of people that would drop the N bomb every chance they got.
Million Dollar Baby
Nobody has heard about it. Sybil says it's a boxing drama. Pugs thinks it sounds like a movie where Bruce Willis would dub over the baby.
Sideways
It has that dude from Wings and Pig Vomit from Howard Stern's Private Parts.
Robert calls in to say that he liked Saw. Pugs and Kelly still haven't seen it. Pugs really liked hanging out with the people they saw that movie but they obviously didn't like them enough to see it.
Spiderman 2
Pugs thought that movie totally sucked. Kelly wants to see an original idea.
*break*
Kelly coughs and Tony Casillas wonders if there is a cough button. He says that those cookies that Kelly made look more like moon pies and says that he's going to enjoy those. Pugs brings up how Tony was inducted into the College Football Hall of Fame last week. Tony says that he felt pretty good when he found out that over 4 million players have played college football since the 40s and there are only 680 people in the hall of fame. he got a hall of fame ring. Pugs wonders where it's at and Tony tells him he didn't' wear it today. Pugs wonders who gets paid more, college players or pros. Tony says that when he went pro he had to take a cut in pay.
It's time for the Cowboy's recap. Tony says that he fell into the Julius Jones romance but he forgot that a quarterback has to show up to play. He thinks that it was evident that he had a concussion from the Seattle game. He brings up how New Orleans is last in defense and we couldn't score on them. Kelly brings up how Tony described it as drinking the Julius Jones kool-aid. Pugs says that he drank the Julius Jones Kool-aid and the Chad Hutchinson kool-aid and now he's sick to his stomach. Tony points out that all the teams searching for a wild card lost last week so nothing has really changed. Pugs wonders if they'll hit 8-8 and Tony says they won't cause they have the Eagles next week. Pugs thinks they should put in Henson then. Tony thinks that's a good idea because then it helps you figure out what you're going to do in the draft picks and trades. Tony complains about the cornerbacks. Pugs thinks that Terrence Newman is disappointing. Kelly wonders if he's hurt and Tony says that he plays like he's hurt. Tim calls in to say that Terrence Newman played all right yesterday except for when he got that interception and came out of the end zone on the one. He covered Joe Horn well but he did trip up on Joe Horn... I thought that was Lance Frazier....
*break*
Pugs has more crazy details about Nathan Gale, the guy that shot Dimebag last week. He was an odd ball loner who sought friendship. He was a passionate fan of Pantera and felt the break up of the band in 2003 as a personal insult. Kelly wonders if he would have felt better if they called him to check if it was OK to break up. Gale was known for his bizarre behavior. He use to pet imaginary dogs and talk to walls. Kelly wants to start doing that in malls. Pugs thinks that would be a great thing to do if you get stuck on the dude couch at the chick stores. If you do this, nobody will come near you. Pugs makes Sybil does it and she makes it too big. Pugs tells her to pet the imaginary kitty and Pugs thinks that she has a great stare. He was 6'3'', 266 pounds and was the butt of many jokes. He wasn't too popular around the ladies either. Kelly thinks that if he lived here, he'd be a listener. He was discharged early from the marines for supposedly having mental problems. Pugs reminds us that he was the guy that brought Pantera lyrics to his friends house and told everyone that they stole his songs and identity. Kelly brings up that they get freaky e-mail... hey, I'm sorry... no more virtual dead gerbils in the e-mail... Gale recently started playing semi-pro football. Gale's friends started distancing themselves from him after the pantera lyrics scandal. He started talking about killing people and told friends that God told him to kill Marilyn Manson. A friend tried pot, acid, and cocaine with him.... I'm going to go on record as saying that you shouldn't give your insane 6'3'' 266 pounds buddy acid and coke.... Pugs teaches us that they seem harmless right up until the point to where they aren't harmless.
Pugs brings up the fire in Dallas and Kelly says that they heard it was a 4 alarm fire. She tells us that all they've seen is a guy on a golf cart though.
SYBILIZATION AS WE KNOW IT!
1. The only person in the house where that fire is at, was a woman. She's fine. The house was in a country club and was 560,000 square feet. They've evacuated several of the neighbors but the fire is under control. It took 80 fire fighters to put out the flames.
Kelly thinks they need to get better fire fighters.
2. In Ohio, doctors removed a 66 pound tumor from her stomach.
Pugs wonders if that's why he's fat. Kelly thinks that would be cool cause then you'd have to get it removed and you're not being vain.
It took 4 people to left it.
Kelly brags that she can life 66 pounds and Pugs thinks that we need stronger doctors.
3. Golden Globe Nominees have just been released. You can view the entire list
here.
4. Ellen DeGeneres has left her girlfriend for...
Sybil makes Pugs guess who. Pugs guesses Portia de Rossi and he's right! Pugs and Kelly knew she was a lesbian... little known fact, she was engaged to Ringo Starr's step daughter.... Kelly says that she can dress dykey. They fell in love 5 months ago but they both had girlfriends. They fooled around at VH-1's hot in 2004 awards. The next day De Rossi left her girlfriend and DeGeneres asked her girlfriend to move out. Pugs thinks that De Rossi is so hot that he's getting turned on even though Ellen is in the story too.
*break*
5. Lindsay Lohan almost broke down the doors of Scores. Vin Diesel told Lohan to come out to Scores on Friday night. She showed up at 6 am on Saturday and started banging on the doors. She was screaming "Vin Diesel told me to come". The Security had to tell her that they were closed. She tried to pull the "don't you know who I am?" and insisted that it was OK because Vin Diesel said so.
6. Diana Ross threw a fit at the Billboard awards because she didn't want to use a trailer as a dressing room. She was screaming "Miss Ross will not be using a trailer". Brittany Spears got inside Gwen Stefani's trailer and refused to leave.
Kelly thinks that Brittany probably just felt at home.
7. The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame just announced their inductees for 2005.
Kelly wonders if they play "cha'll want" to decide what goes on in the Rock and Roll hall of fame.
Percy Sledge
Nobody can remember what he sings. Pugs says that he gets Percy Sledge confused with Sly and the Family Stone... How is that possible? Percy Sledge sucks. Sly and the Family Stone rock harder than bagel bites.... Sybil tells us that Percy sang "When a Man Loves a Woman'. Pugs and Sybil sing. Kelly doesn't think it's rock and roll baby.
The Pretenders
The O'Jays
Pugs sings "Backstabbers" a lot of songs that probably aren't O'Jays songs. Sybil tells him that they sang "Love Train" and "Use to be my Girl". Kelly sings "Use to be my Girl" and Pugs sings "Love Train". Kelly stops and everyone joins Pugs. Pugs wonders if they sang "Back Stabbers" and Sybil says it's possible.... they did in fact sing Backstabbers.
Buddy Guy
Pugs and Kelly says that's good. They can't name anything he did but they know his restaurant.
U2
Pugs thinks that's a big one but believes that's a lame class.
8. Kobe Bryant has accused Karl Malone of making a pass at his wife during a game last week. Kobe considered Karl a great friend and a mentor. Karl Malone seemed surprised and has apologized to Kobe and his wife if they think he said anything inappropriate.
Pugs says that this story has been a rumor for a month. However, it's been toned down a lot by the press. Pugs reminds us how Vanessa Bryant is such a great wife. She takes her 2 million dollar ring and stands by Kobe while he bangs teenagers. Karl was this old experienced NBA player that they brought to the lakers to finally win him a ring. They also brought him in to be a peace maker between Kobe and Shaq. The rumor is that Vanessa Bryant slept with Karl Malone to get back at Kobe for his extra-marital fun times. Pugs suggests that maybe Kobe is upset by the rumors. Sybil brings up that the two couples use to hang out together.... They supposedly live very close together. This probably means that they go tot he same grocery store. That would suck. In line to pay for your lettuce and canned pears and behind you is the dude that slept with your wife. Holy crap, and you have to pass to him during games. That's got to suck....
9. Bernard Kerick withdrew his nomination as homeland secuirty secretary over "nanny gate". It turns out that he's also been having affairs with two women. One was with a city corrections officer leader and the second one was with... Pugs says that Kerick set up a stabbin' cabin. He also had an affair with Judith Reagan of Reagan books. She is the hottest celebrity memoir book publisher. Pugs explains that Judith sent Kerick a note and his other mistress found it. She calls Judith and they talk about how both of them are screwing him. Kelly reminds us that you shouldn't take a cabinet position if you don't want people to know your dirty little secrets.
10. Scarlet Johanson is supposedly dating Derick Jeter. They went to a Microsoft Christmas party together and left early.
Pugs thinks that guy is really lucky. Kelly thinks that it's really hot that they went to a Microsoft party.
11. Weekend Box Office...
5. Christmas with the Kranks
4. Polar Express
3. National Treasure
2. Blade Trinity
1. Ocean's 12
*break*
We come back to the Killers. Kelly says that her daughter really likes this band but she's conflicted by that. There isn't any swearing but it's all adult subject matter. She was listening on Kelly's mp3 player. The song finished and then McKenna told Kelly that she thinks something is wrong. She thought the same song was playing for a while. She realized it wasn't the same song but told Kelly that it's the same voice coming out of the same human. Pugs thinks that Kelly's daughter is retarded.
Dr. Schwartz joins the show. Kelly explains that we're talking to Schwartz because Pugs keeps getting e-mails of pictures that people are telling him are Kelly's boobs. Pugs thinks that it's Kelly. Pugs thinks it's disturbing that they keep popping up on his computer. You can see them at
rsplastic.com. Pugs didn't know Dr, Schwartz had boobs on the website. Kelly wonders how anybody can be sure it's Kelly. Pugs says that it looks like her. It has the same body type and the same hair. Eric says that it could be Kelly but Kelly's boobs seemed smaller than the picture's "before" boobs. Kelly explains that Pugs doesn't believe her when she says that it's not her. Dr. Schwartz says it's not Kelly on the website. He tells us that Kelly has never come back for her follow up. He doesn't even know what Kelly looks like now. Kelly laughs at Dr. Schwartz for not being able to see his results. Pugs lets Dr. Schwartz know that he does excellent work.... He really does.
rsplastic.com gets my highest praise for late night all alone drunken Internet fun.... Kelly assures us that it's not her boobs on the website. Pugs tells us that he's been looking at the boobs all day and he thinks their great. He admits that he feels really weird because he thinks it's Kelly. Kelly admits that they look very similar to hers. Pugs sells Kelly out by saying that she aked Tony Casillas if he wanted to see what everyone thought were her boobs. Eric says that Pugs asked Tony if he wanted to see them. Pugs denies this. Jerry calls in to say that they're not Kelly's boobs because they're his. Pugs tells Jerry that he has nice boobs. Shelly calls in to ask what picture they're looking at and says that she had work done by Schwartz. Shelly thinks the pictures that they are looking up were up on his site before Kelly had her work done. Shawn calls in to say that he was looking at
rsplastic.com with his wife and they both thought it was Kelly. The pictures in question are the first two pictures that pop up on the breast augmentation results.
*break*
They play that dirty little song "Santa Baby". That song disturbs me. What a whore.
There is a public memorial for Dimebag Darrel on Tuesday, December 14 at 8 pm at the Arlington convention center.
E-mail me at Will@pugsandkellylive.com
